The Myth Of Multiples (Orgasms, That Is)

*WARNING: The following post is a frank discussion of sexual practices and situations some might find offensive. If you are under 18, or find such discussions objectionable, please explore my other posts and pages.*

That’s that, so let’s get on with the important stuff, m’kay?

One of the big pet peeves that both readers and writers seem to have with romance novels is lack of realism in matters pertaining to orgasms. If I had a nickel for every time I’ve read a comment someone left regarding the implausibility of multiple orgasms for both Hero and Heroine, well… You know the rest of the line.

So, that got me thinking… Yes, thank you, I’m well aware of the hazards associated with that activity!

Are multiple orgasms impossible? For just males? Or for both males and females? (See that? I’m pretending I don’t already know the answer :D )

Many people, of both sexes, seem to regard Real Life multiple orgasms as a myth, for either sex. Others will concede that some women are capable of more than one orgasm during a single session of sexual activity. Most seem convinced that a man is incapable of more than one during a single session, without a sufficient recovery period between, and that men are unable to maintain full erection immediately after an orgasm.

I suppose I’m lucky that I knew very little about sex before I became sexually active. Oh, I knew the basics, and what went where, but that’s about it. So I had no preconceived notions of things like a limit on the number of orgasms a person could have during a single sexual experience. Since I didn’t know I could only have one, I had more.

Maybe that’s why so many people think only one is possible? That’s what they’ve always heard, so it must be true, right?

So, the thing with guys is, they actually can have multiple orgasms. They just can’t ejaculate again with out a recovery period, the length of which varies for each man. It takes practice, but guys can ‘train’ their bodies to orgasm without ejaculating. For more info, check out this article on The Frisky, or just Google “dry orgasm”. From experience, you really want your guy to learn this one. I promise, it’s well worth your while.

Not long ago, I read an article that said women can only orgasm from clitoral stimulation, and that wasn’t the first time I’d seen that. As someone who’s never had difficulty achieving vaginal orgasm, I knew that one was bullshit, :D But it does bring up another common complaint about the realism of sex in romance novels. The heroines in older novels, and some contemporary ones, were often depicted having vaginal orgasm, which some readers considered impossible. The truth is, women can not only have multiple orgasms, but we can have different types of orgasms, and different kinds of multiple orgasms! This post on Centerfold Strip brings it all together.

So the next time you hear someone scoff about that sex scene with multiple orgasms for both the hero and the heroine, just smile and say something like, “You’re kidding, right? Only one? How sad.”

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About Kenra Daniels

I write steamy Paranormal Romance and Erotic Romance. I live in a very small town in rural northeastern Kentucky, right at the edge of the Appalachian Mountains, with my very own Romance Novel Hero (aka Hubby) of 26 yrs. We're raising our 3 little grandsons - 5y, 3y, and 2y old.
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9 Responses to The Myth Of Multiples (Orgasms, That Is)

  1. Skinner says:

    Hear hear!
    Skinner recently posted..Research Fodder June 9, 2012My Profile

  2. Nick says:

    Is there any point at all to this post other than for you to celebrate your own fruitful sex life and make sure the world knows you’re coming more than the rest of us?

    • Hi Nick, thanks for stopping by! Of course there’s a point ;) More than one, actually.

      I shared a couple of links with further info, and mentioned that multiple orgasms are possible for both genders, not just for myself, and not just for women.

      I also addressed a pet peeve many people have with romance novels, and pointed out that novels might not be as completely unrealistic as commonly believed. As a romance writer, talking about things like readers’ pet peeves with my genre is just one of the things I do.

      And in conclusion, although this post was not intended to be boastful, or to make anyone feel less adequate, I hope you’ll forgive me for celebrating just a little :D As someone with chronic health issues, I’ll take any respite I can get from the constant pain I’m in, even though I take several very strong medications. For me at least, sex is pretty good medicine, and I’m grateful for it.
      Kenra Daniels recently posted..The Myth Of Multiples (Orgasms, That Is)My Profile

  3. Kenra,
    That is really fascinating and not from a pervy, creepy, guy perspective either. A lot of people have preconcieved notions regarding sex and I believe that those notions can inhibit a person’s ability to be satisfied. Thanks for sharing. :)

    • Hi Andrew, LMAO, glad that wasn’t from a pervy, creepy, guy perspective!

      I think you’re absolutely right – our ideas about lots of things limit us, whether it’s how many orgasms, or how far we can run or how well we can do on a test. If we expect to only achieve a specific quantity, we’re unlikely to surpass that quantity.

      When a runner sets a spectacular new record, beating one that’s stood for decades, suddenly, it isn’t long before lots more runners are beating that old record. The new record becomes the absolute best runners expect from themselves – unless it’s so high as to be considered unattainable.
      Kenra Daniels recently posted..The Myth Of Multiples (Orgasms, That Is)My Profile

  4. Brian Shelby says:

    I don’t doubt that men and women can enjoy multiple orgasms my girlfriend has often commented that just when she thinks she has had the last one and isn’t able to go anymore that somehow I help her to experience the feeling like it’s a gift that just keeps giving. Rock On! XOXO Brian
    Brian Shelby recently posted..To Achieve More Hot Sex between Men and Women We’re…My Profile

  5. Palm says:

    I read Mantak Chia’s ‘The Multi Orgasmic Man’ quite a long time ago and kind of forgot about it, but orgasming without ejaculating sounds like a worthy challenge, I think you need really strong PC muscles and a lot of practice.
    Palm recently posted..9 Steps To Make Her Want To Learn How To SquirtMy Profile

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  • Just Sayin’

    I'm a Romance Author - mainly Paranormal, but nearly all with fairly graphic intimate scenes. Those scenes serve to further the development of my plots and characters and are not included haphazardly to sell books or arouse readers.

    I probably COULD tell the stories without the graphic parts, but I CHOOSE not to. I want to show the full scope of the developing relationship, and leaving out some of the most powerful and meaningful moments will deprive the reader of a measure of understanding and emotional reaction to the characters and their stories.

    Since I write books intended for adult readers, I often have material on my website that is entirely unsuitable for younger readers. If you're under 18, or if you're easily offended by open discussion of sexual situations with frank language, you might want to look the other direction.